It's About Time

My sister, Laura, lived in El Paso and was just so isolated. She had several bad encounters with the neighbors that were affecting her quite a bit. Sometimes when one lives alone with little social contact one begins to live in an alternate reality that becomes too real to themselves. Her sons and I decided that it was time to move her to a more secure environment. We moved her to a private assisted living home in Mesa. I took her to the necessary doctors to have her physical and mental health evaluated. Luckily, everything is finally smoothed out. She is quite healthy other than her high blood pressure and extreme anxiety and paranoia. Now that she is on the appropriate medication visiting her every week is a joy. We are going to new restaurants and she is loving every minute we spend together. Her short term memory is extremely affected, but she sure can remember the past. Now that her mental and physical issues are under control she is happy and her caregivers enjoy her company. They are getting very attached and bonding. She remembers all she had (material things) in El Paso and wishes she still had access. Unfortunately, it is not possible to bring a lifetime of accumulations into one room. My mother lived with us the last 3 1/2 years of her life and died at 92. I have learned a lot about dementia and geriatric maladies. Laura is my last family member so I hope to have more years to spend with her. Getting old is an uncharted world filled with issues, illnesses, deaths of loved ones and uncertain tomorrows.No amount of exercising, face lifts, tummy tucks, or breast enhancements make one bit of difference to our appointed road.  

New Year, new goals for my blog. It has sat and sat and I have not posted since I don't really believe anyone cares what I'm doing so . . . . I'm going to talk about the books I read. At least this way I can remember what I've enjoyed.

I just finished reading The Dark Monk (a Hangman's Daughter Tale). Lately most of the mysteries I've been attracted to have a strong historical leaning. This novel/mystery takes place in the Bavarian Alps in 1660. Not knowing anything about hangmen and the fact he has a headstrong independent thinking daughter, Magdalena, made me want to learn more. Being a hangman is a necessary occupation, if feared. Wife, daughter and anyone associated with him brings a strong stigma. The story starts with the death of a parish priest. Jacob, the hangman realizes that the priest was poisoned. As he and his daughter try to make sense of the murder the mystery begins to thicken with the addition of the possibility of of a Knights of Templar treasure. The son of the town's physician, Simon, cares for Magdalena even though their relationship is banned, joins in to learn what the priest knew that got him killed. So you have a hangman, a willful daughter, a well read physician's son, a sister of the murdered priest and 448 pages to heal the sick, learn historical customs, religious insanities, and follow the twisted tale to find the killer(s). The mystery itself was well done, but the immersion into such a lost world was the true reason I kept reading and I did not want the story to end. The epilogue and learning the family history of the author, Oliver Potzsch made the whole experience extremely satisfying.

New Promise to Self

The gods have blessed me with lots and lots of earrings. They have also blessed me with the talent to make super girly bracelets. In order that the gods not stop blessing me with these gifts I must use them! My goal is to use a different pair of earrings daily and to wear a bracelet every time I leave the house. So if I'm making tinkling sounds as I walk through the market, smile.

It's Raining!!!!

It so seldom rains in Phoenix that it must be a remarkable day. I've been thinking about activating this blog and posting as the title says, ramblings. It is adjustment for me to deal with an empty house. Mom has passed and I still find myself thinking she's still here. I still hear her advice in my head. Rats. Her "advice" is usually so critical that it ruins anything I'm doing or plan on doing. I still hear my sister so I guess hearing mom is not much different. If you've never heard voices in your mind you are lucky. I can carry on these long involved discussions supplying responses for both sides.
Anyway, I want to participate in on-line chats and contests. They always want you to link to your blog so that they can see your submission. I haven't decided whether to use this one or create one just for the arty stuff. I could use my flicker so I guess a decision has to be made. I'm off to think.

Time has moved on

It's been a year since I last posted. It has been a very active year taking care of my mom. I have continued to depend on friends and family to keep me sane. It is so hard to watch one's mother become so much less than she was. I just haven't had the desire to post my feelings. It's like once they are in black and white they become real. I don't want any of my less than positive feelings on paper. I guess I am a true Gemini in that one part of me feels so much love for her and another part of me is tired and wants a break. I'm sure that my feelings are not unique. I just wish that I could do more, but when I think about it I am doing more than I expected to do and she wants for nothing. I have no regrets.

I love my nephew

I am so blessed. My sister's children always bring me joy. Geebs, Geeber, Riel is so multi-facited that he has 4 names. Gabriel just was not enough. There is little that he could ask of me that I would not do for him. Everytime he calls Lynn and I smile because we know the topic of the call will always surprise us. He is so sharp and he flies up so high that we often loose sight of his thoughts. He has patience with us mortals.

Cremation or Burial

My husband has been talking on and off about cremation. I listen with one ear. Why cremation? He doesn't want anyone to have to clean his grave. Okay. We live in AZ his family is in UT so where to bury? Okay you can be cremated.

We visited an attorney about a month ago to finalize his will. While we went over his will and explained how if he went first, all assets would pass to me. If I went first, all assets would go to him except for any items that my nieces would want and claim. We learned at that time that if we were in an accident together and he died first and I died 48 hours later, then all his assets would have transferred to me as surviving spouse and then my will would apply. I don't intentionally have a problem with after death plans so I better quit procrastinating and get one made. Another thing. Since he wants to be cremated, he went out and explored the whole thing and bought a reservation or whatever you call it.

The attorney was fine with it, but looked at me and asked me what my plans were. Dang! I had thought to be buried with him and now that he plans to be a pile of ashes in an urn where the hell do I go? My mom is to be buried with my dad at the VA cemetary. Right now I think I want to buried with my sister in Georgetown, TX with Lynn's ashes in my casket. He want to give me half the ashes and half to his daugther. I guess it's time to buy a plot next to her. All her children are married and will probably do their own thing. I'm the odd one out.

The creepy thing is that I have a box at the top of the closet with the fancy jewlery looking boxes that will hold my honey. Ewee!